Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Quote for today

Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do.
- John Wooden

Tuesday, November 10, 2009


Good Morning,
I should open this segment with prayer as I am in great need this morning.
The morning started off so badly that I called my then husband for support.
Yup. 3000 miles away, time difference and all... I needed him.
Not as a husband, but as DAD.
Yes the children were acting up again.
I get so overwhelmed.
They act as if they are 10 years old and raising these kids as a "single Mom" ain't easy.
But then he reminded me we had already raised them.
I was just providing a roof over their heads now.
He told me to lay the rules down.
Poo poo or get off the pot.

Everyone knows you never let your ex see you sweat.
But this morning, I might as well have asked him for the deoderant.
You know, we are so blessed when we stop to think of all we have.
Thirty years and then divorced sounds harsh but I would have never had the joy of hearing him sober, happy and in LOVE and I, would have never become the Chrisitian Heir.
My relationship with GOD was so distant and vague.
His Life was hanging by a thread, soaked in alcohol.
The best thing after all this time is that we can actually say we truly love one another now.
Yes, I do like him now too.
And what progress we have made we can see and appreciate.
I think a lot of it has to do with loosing our Dads.
And seasons.
There are reasons for seasons.
And seasons for reasons.
I always thought we would retire under the coconut tree together too but now I just ask GOD to let me die near him, prefrably in his arms (if she will let me).
That must make ya'll wonder; its a strange request.
But we started off buddies, I 'd hope we would end that way.
In the meantime, I will stop off at the Sanctuary and Praise GOD for this day and all the days past for that matter. I will thank HIM for courage. For it took a great deal of courage to call and ask for his comforting words, to have him remind me I am in control and to start taking time for me. To hear it from him holds such validity to me. It felt safe and secure. Thank you "Then".
As for the children, I will run the riot act to them this evening, again.
and get 2 lifes.....
Because I need to get mine.
I gotta go now.
Gotta go and regain my dignity.

Monday, November 09, 2009

Coming thru the back door

Good Golly Miss Molly!
I feel like a spy.
The changes I have to go thru to get to this site are unbelievable.
But as I am the Christian Heir, I so gratefully give thanks to Our Heavenly Dad, oops don't get silly, Our Heavenly Father because I have to go thru Pradia2040 to get to my site, which allows me and promises I get to read his blog daily and still write! WHOOOOOOOOOSH. Mouthful.
I wanna talk about changes.
Almost 5 years ago I went thru some changes.
And then 5 years before that I went thru some different changes.
Today I am going thru another set and wondering why they are (still) so familiar to me.
I thought when you go thru something, its normally a lesson.
Well, I am becoming frustrated with this set of lessons.
It seems I keep banging my head against the wall.
I've seen this wall before kids, an OH! too familiar site.
So I am working on a few 'Do Me' skills this week.
So far this week, I went thru the closet and sorted thru all my summer attire.
I thru away a gross amount of T-shirts bearing cute little puppies and rainbows and even one with the silver embossed QUEEN on it. For some reason that shirt reminded me all but royalty.
I packed away all my OLD NAVY flip flops. You know the ones you get for 2 for $5.00?
So since its an odd price and an even number you end up buying more pairs than you need?
I dunno.
That's how my brain works it out.
SOoooo, then I went to a tag sale and bought in all new stuff.
Makes sense right?
What I did buy was a pair of newborn pj's for Buddy.
He's Ty's Cabbage patch.
Somehow I can't stand looking at Buddy's bare arse.
To top it off Ked even gave place to the idea of having a tattoo yup, you guessed it.
I ain't even got to finish.
What's his name? Xavier?
Right there on her right butt cheek.
I'll stick with a MOON tat on my neck.
But anywho.
I'm now on this new leg of my Journey and I need to make some touch ups.
You know like a rough edges kinda thang?
I'm typing and working too here.
How do you answer the phone clearly and concisely, slowly, sounding out 7 syllables, and they ask you, "Is this JET BLUE?".
Back on the ranch.
I will take it a day at the time, thanks to my then husband.
(He has taught me this one).
He does well at this task.
I will relax and enjoy this week.
Come next Sunday I will work on a new project.
I am going to live well.
I've cried way too much in the last 4 weeks.
Time to laugh.
...time to make some changes towards me...
When you step back and take a look at the BIG picture?!
What are we so worried about?
Rewind as far back as you can go.
It always worked out for the best.