CHANGES PART II

Good Morning,
I should open this segment with prayer as I am in great need this morning.
The morning started off so badly that I called my then husband for support.
Yup. 3000 miles away, time difference and all... I needed him.
Not as a husband, but as DAD.
Yes the children were acting up again.
I get so overwhelmed.
They act as if they are 10 years old and raising these kids as a "single Mom" ain't easy.
But then he reminded me we had already raised them.
I was just providing a roof over their heads now.
He told me to lay the rules down.
Poo poo or get off the pot.
Contribute.
Consider.
Communicate.

Everyone knows you never let your ex see you sweat.
But this morning, I might as well have asked him for the deoderant.
You know, we are so blessed when we stop to think of all we have.
Thirty years and then divorced sounds harsh but I would have never had the joy of hearing him sober, happy and in LOVE and I, would have never become the Chrisitian Heir.
My relationship with GOD was so distant and vague.
His Life was hanging by a thread, soaked in alcohol.
The best thing after all this time is that we can actually say we truly love one another now.
Yes, I do like him now too.
And what progress we have made we can see and appreciate.
I think a lot of it has to do with loosing our Dads.
And seasons.
There are reasons for seasons.
And seasons for reasons.
I always thought we would retire under the coconut tree together too but now I just ask GOD to let me die near him, prefrably in his arms (if she will let me).
That must make ya'll wonder; its a strange request.
But we started off buddies, I 'd hope we would end that way.
In the meantime, I will stop off at the Sanctuary and Praise GOD for this day and all the days past for that matter. I will thank HIM for courage. For it took a great deal of courage to call and ask for his comforting words, to have him remind me I am in control and to start taking time for me. To hear it from him holds such validity to me. It felt safe and secure. Thank you "Then".
As for the children, I will run the riot act to them this evening, again.
GET A JOB
GET A JOB
and get 2 lifes.....
Because I need to get mine.
I gotta go now.
Gotta go and regain my dignity.
Ciao.